Being Alone
Disclaimer: This could be messy. This post is going to be pretty personal. Much whining/complaining/praising God is to follow.
I am at a very unique place in my life right now. With the exception of the Holy Spirit, I am completely and utterly alone. You see, my parents (and my doggy) moved to South Carolina last week to pursue their life-long dream of living on the beach and playing golf everyday. And the rest of my family is scattered throughout Pennsylvania and Maryland. And, also as of last week, I am single for the first time in a year and a half. Lovely timing, right?
Up until recently in my life, I have always lived with my parents, obviously. I depended on them and they depended on me. I still depend on them in some ways, but there's only so much that can be done when they live over 10 hours away. Looking to the future, I won't be alone for very much longer either. If I ever get married or have kids I will be depending on them and they will be depending on me. I won't be truly alone. But right now, I have none of that in my life. I feel like this sort of lonely season does not occur very often in life, and probably won't ever again. So like I said, it's a very unique time.
And it's a hard time. All of these changes occurred about a week and a half ago. Although I was prepared for my family's move, I was completely unprepared for the breakup. Not to be the dramatic, love-sick, teenage girl, but that was really difficult, even though it was 100% from God. Last week may have quite possibly been the hardest week of my life.
But thankfully, the Lord opened my eyes and I now see what a blessing this time truly is. What an amazing opportunity I have to grow closer to Him! Yes, you can grow closer to Christ when you are surrounded by people, but how much more will I have to rely on Him now that I don't really have anyone!? How much more intimate will our relationship become!? Holy smokes, I cannot even imagine. I am so excited to be blessed with this time of solitude so our relationship can grow!
Yes, loneliness is hard and it can suck. Trust me, I've experienced that earlier this week. But God loves me so much that He is willing to drag me through these tough valleys if it means I will be closer to Him. That blows my mind! He is so good!
So times are hard but I will choose to rejoice. The Lord has given me this special and unique time in my life for a reason and I WILL NOT waste it. I simply won't. As I've discovered recently, sometimes it's easier to just be sad and mope around. But even though that's the easier road, I will not take it. I will rejoice and cling to Jesus and grow closer to Him. Despite my earthly desires, that's all I really want in the end. To grow closer and stand firmer in Him.
He loves us so much.
I am at a very unique place in my life right now. With the exception of the Holy Spirit, I am completely and utterly alone. You see, my parents (and my doggy) moved to South Carolina last week to pursue their life-long dream of living on the beach and playing golf everyday. And the rest of my family is scattered throughout Pennsylvania and Maryland. And, also as of last week, I am single for the first time in a year and a half. Lovely timing, right?
Up until recently in my life, I have always lived with my parents, obviously. I depended on them and they depended on me. I still depend on them in some ways, but there's only so much that can be done when they live over 10 hours away. Looking to the future, I won't be alone for very much longer either. If I ever get married or have kids I will be depending on them and they will be depending on me. I won't be truly alone. But right now, I have none of that in my life. I feel like this sort of lonely season does not occur very often in life, and probably won't ever again. So like I said, it's a very unique time.
And it's a hard time. All of these changes occurred about a week and a half ago. Although I was prepared for my family's move, I was completely unprepared for the breakup. Not to be the dramatic, love-sick, teenage girl, but that was really difficult, even though it was 100% from God. Last week may have quite possibly been the hardest week of my life.
But thankfully, the Lord opened my eyes and I now see what a blessing this time truly is. What an amazing opportunity I have to grow closer to Him! Yes, you can grow closer to Christ when you are surrounded by people, but how much more will I have to rely on Him now that I don't really have anyone!? How much more intimate will our relationship become!? Holy smokes, I cannot even imagine. I am so excited to be blessed with this time of solitude so our relationship can grow!
Yes, loneliness is hard and it can suck. Trust me, I've experienced that earlier this week. But God loves me so much that He is willing to drag me through these tough valleys if it means I will be closer to Him. That blows my mind! He is so good!
So times are hard but I will choose to rejoice. The Lord has given me this special and unique time in my life for a reason and I WILL NOT waste it. I simply won't. As I've discovered recently, sometimes it's easier to just be sad and mope around. But even though that's the easier road, I will not take it. I will rejoice and cling to Jesus and grow closer to Him. Despite my earthly desires, that's all I really want in the end. To grow closer and stand firmer in Him.
He loves us so much.
i know where you are & how you feel (not so much the parents thing.. but the single aspect). the Lord is faithful & he loves us. we must run to Him with all that we are. praying for you in this time. love you friend.
ReplyDeleteThanks Elizabeth! Thank you for the encouragement and the prayers! Love you too!! :)
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